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Bedknobs and buncakes

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Last night when I wanted to flop into bed and drift off to sleep whilst watching ‘Ghosthunting with… the only way is Essex’ (it’s reem to scream innit love, awright triffic etc etc).  I was slightly perturbed by the 4D element of the show and the fact that my bed appeared to be floating off the floor at one end.  Before I rang Derek Acorah to get himself round  (“Mary loves Dick”) I remembered that Bman had been tinkering about under the bed earlier on sorting out his vast collection of shit (smoke machines, strobe lights, dumbbells he hasn’t lifted in over 15 years etc).

“I wonder how that’s happened?” he pondered as I stood  holding up the mattress in one corner of the room in my smalls (or should that be ‘mediums’ given the size of me and the topic of TV show I was trying to watch), whilst he mused, screwdriver hand.

Could it have happened while you were fucking about putting things back under the bed and continually lifting the bed frame up and down?” I pondered to myself, not wishing to wind him up whilst he was armed.  He did get a bit peeved when I took a  photo of him trying to screw the bed back together without getting his ankles wedged between the slats and accused me of taking the piss (Moi?).

So glad that he was the likely cause and not me otherwise I would never have heard the last of it.


Anyhow, problem since solved and thus far, bed still in one piece.


Today’s prize for “Keeping a straight face in spite of the situation” goes to Me!  For not caving when, during a conversation with class about the possibility of an end of term party. the phrase, “And Miss Brewer’s buns are a spectacle to behold believe me, just you wait till you see them” was used without so much as an eyebrow raised.

Well, I don’t like to brag but….

Marvellous Buns


About TheDHW

Not loathed by totally everyone so that's good right?

3 responses »

  1. withheld for a laugh

    Awwww isn’t she special, my girlfriend. Bless her. Honestly don’t know what the teaching world would do without her. Probably survive – just.

    Currently going through my vinyl collection in search of further suitable ditties for you. Quite chuffed with my submnissions so far but suspect a golden nugget is just around the corner….

    hope to see you (and your buns) soon for a catch up

    • withheld for a laugh

      that will be submissions then

      • Funnily enough my latest suggestion of Afroman ‘And then I got high’ was also rejected. Ditto – Samantha Fox, ‘Touch me (I want to feel your body)’.

        Keep ’em coming

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