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“Beg your pardon??”

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So if I were compiling a coffee table book of Phrases you never thought you’d hear spoken aloud whilst at work (and trust me, I could).  I’m pretty sure that these two would rank rather highly, although I’m not sure which is my favourite:-

  • Who’s touched my laminated vulva in the stock cupboard?”

and a rather over-enthusiastic:-

  • Sperm!  Mmmmm absolutely!”


Would I lie to you?    Spring term.  Sex Ed.  What can I say?


Several friends found my frapebook status of yesterday highly entertaining; with a couple of them admitting that they actually can…. so there! 

So on that note (because by now most of you will have tuned out and your imaginations will be running riot) I bid you good evening!


"If only I had a longer neck I think I could reach"



About TheDHW

Not loathed by totally everyone so that's good right?

4 responses »

  1. you may be right there……..

    • I forgot to add, “Hands up if you’ve ever called your friend a gayboy?”

      • My personal favourite was “there’s this peado goes down the park wears a dress” …. to which a certain DHW replied, ” I know him”

      • I think you’ll find, my actual words were; “I’ve seen him”. We’re not close acquaintances or anything. 😀

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