RSS Feed

I’ll take your finest tinsel wig please Sir!

Posted on

Reference my post yesterday about a bald killer on the loose:-

This gem caught my eye on AOL news when I was checking to so see what was happening on this story:–

“On Saturday, Lang said sightings of Allen in the Cleveland and North Yorkshire Police areas were continuing to be reported as well as potential sightings in Leeds on Thursday and Friday.

The detective said it was possible that Allen was trying to change his appearance by growing his hair.”

Might I suggest that he may have popped over to the Boro to head down the Joke Shop for a comedy wig, which would be a damn sight quicker way of altering his appearance than waiting for his barnet to grow!  The news story also said there may have been possible sightings in the Harehills area of Leeds.  I draw your attention once more to what I said about people answering his description in the Lord Rosebury pub – again, difficult to spot the right one!

On the topic of comedy barnets & people who look like serial killers. I went into Sadford Town today for my sins.  It was a dire and uninspiring retail experience  if I’m honest and I have begged Bman to stop me at all costs if I ever forget how it made me feel today and try and do it again ever in the future.

Here is a fairly accurate transcript of a conversation I overheard on the bus between 2 women, one of whom looked like this guy off the Muppets, (oh the irony!) and her child (aged approx 5), on the bus on the way home:-

she didn't have a hat or a sax, or blue hair but otherwise.....


“Hey I used to live there in them flats”  (points to tennement looking building)

“Why did you mum?”

“Cos I wanted me own place like – in facts that’s where I met your dad”

“What? my daddy?”

“No not him I mean your REAL dad”

“Oh him. He int my real dad”

“Yeah he is! You’re talking shit now you are”

“You tried to stab him dint yer mum?”

“Yeah but only cos he tried to stab me first”

“Why did he?”

“Cos he’s a fucking prick!”

“Did you stab him in the head mum?”

“Yup but he dint die…. pity!”

“Did you get in trouble?”

“Yeah you know I did. Remember? but it’s all sorted now”

“You should’ve stabbed him harder mum, through his head then he’d be dead”


(changes subject and starts to talk to friend about child’s ability at school)

“He’s a good lad at school int yer?”

“Yeah I am. 40 and 40 is 80”

“See, he’s a clever lad my son and I’ve told him if anyone hits him he’s to smack em back and I’ll give him a fiver for everyone he hits”

(Mate interjects)  “But now he’s gonna go and punch people on purpose to get money off you”

“Nah! I’ve only told him that if anyone smacks him first”

(Child looks deep in thought as idea begins to form in his head)


Here’s an insight into what idea is forming in my head:-

I need Bman to sort it and arrange it all though and that way I am relinquished of all responsibility and absolved of all blame.


About TheDHW

Not loathed by totally everyone so that's good right?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: