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The strife of Brian

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Phone conversation I had on Saturday night when I took a call from an unrecognised number:-

Me:  Hallo

Woman:  (after a few seconds)  Who’s this?

Me:  It’s Kit

Her:  Who’s Kit?

Me:  It’s me.  You rang me

Her:  I know I did.  Who are you?

Me:  Kit

Her:  Who are you though?

Me:   Erm, the woman whose phone you called

Her:  Is Brian with you?

Me:  Who?

Her:  Brian!  This is Brian’s phone.

Me:  No.  It’s my phone

Her:  Who are you?

Me:   It’s Kit.

Her:  I know that.  You said so.  Where’s Brian?

Me:  There is no Brian

Her:  Yes there is.  You’re on his phone

Me:  No. this is my phone

Her:  Why isn’t Brian there?

Me:  I don’t know any Brian

Her:  But this is his number, you’re on his phone

Me:  No it isn’t and no I’m not

Her:  Who is this again?

Me:  I think you know who it is?

Her:  Kit?

Me:  Yup!

Her:  But where are you? What are you doing with Brian’s phone?

Me:  *sigh*   It’s MY phone.  There is NO Brian here, This is Kit’s phone.

Her:  Could I have dialled wrong maybe?

Me:   I think that’s likely yes

Her:  Well I’ll try again but I’m sure this is the number I was given

Me:  *click*

Conversation I had Sunday night:

Me:  Hallo

Woman:  Brian?

Me:  Oh good Lord!

Her:  Brian?

Me:  Nope.  It’s Kit

Her:  Kit?

Me:  *sigh*  Yes

Her:  Not Brian?

Me:  Nope.

Her:  I’m looking for my boyfriend Brian

Me:  He’s not here.  I’m Kit?

Her:  Not Brian?

Me:  Nope.  Can’t help you love

Her:  I may have the wrong number

Me:  D’you think?

Her:  Kit? Not Brian?

Me:  Yup. 

Her:  Kit?

Me:   We spoke last night when you rang me, insisting I had Brian’s phone

Her:  Did I?  Oh I am sorry.  I’ll try again

Me:  Great! Speak to you later…



Just putting it out there that ‘Brian’ may have deliberately given the wrong digits to this lady.  Brian, if you’re out there… run for the hills man.

If she calls me again I am going to make a note of the number and randomly call her from time to time asking for Brian, or even better, tell her that I have Brian and we’re eloping together to Blackpool.

Classic case of one of my all time favourite phrases: ‘Operator Ineptitude’ !

Good work with the phony digits Bri”


About TheDHW

Not loathed by totally everyone so that's good right?

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