Today I have mostly pondered what it would be like to do my job if I was a dwarf. (It was generally agreed that I wouldn’t have quite as much presence).
I have also had a fair old crack at breaking the sound barrier… with my voice… and I hate it when that happens.
On the plus side, apparently the Earth travels through space on the back of a turtle supported by 4 elephants…
Which is awesome.. except it’s not!
Meanwhile, screw the science and geography – this little list below is what children aged 7 to 11 are meant to have learned about in KS2 at primary school, according to the new curriculum:-
[Mr Gove is more than welcome to man up, hop aboard and come and show us all how easy it will be to do this (as well as teaching KS1 about algorithms in ‘computing’)]
(Taken from: DofE New National Curriculum)
>>Pupils should be taught the following chronology of British history sequentially:
early Britons and settlers, including: the Stone, Bronze and Iron Ages
Celtic culture and patterns of settlement
Roman conquest and rule, including: Caesar, Augustus, and Claudius
Britain as part of the Roman Empire
the decline and fall of the Western Roman Empire
Anglo-Saxon and Viking settlement, including: the Heptarchy
the spread of Christianity
key developments in the reigns of Alfred, Athelstan, Cnut and Edward the Confessor
the Norman Conquest and Norman rule, including: the Domesday Book
Plantagenet rule in the 12th and 13th centuries, including: key developments in the reign of Henry II, including the murder of Thomas Becket
de Montfort’s Parliament
relations between England, Wales, Scotland and France, including: William Wallace
Robert the Bruce
Llywelyn and Dafydd ap Gruffydd
the Hundred Years War
life in 14th-century England, including: chivalry
the Black Death
the Peasants’ Revolt
the later Middle Ages and the early modern period, including: Chaucer and the revival of learning
Caxton and the introduction of the printing press
the Wars of the Roses
Warwick the Kingmaker
the Tudor period, including religious strife and Reformation in the reigns of Henry VIII, Edward VI, and Mary
Elizabeth I’s reign and English expansion, including: colonisation of the New World
plantation of Ireland
conflict with Spain
the Renaissance in England, including the lives and works of individuals such as Shakespeare and Marlowe
the Stuart period, including: the Union of the Crowns
Cromwell’s commonwealth, the Levellers and the Diggers
the restoration of the monarchy
the Great Plague and the Great Fire of London
Samuel Pepys and the establishment of the Royal Navy
the Glorious Revolution, constitutional monarchy and the Union of the Parliaments.
Holy fucking shit!
Spending an evening away with the Bman tomorrow for some child-free alone time. I swear if he unpacks a dodgy french maid costume for me or such like, I will get my own back next weekend in the gift shop at WB studio Harry Potter tour!