OMG I’ve been off the grid for like 5 years! (OK so maybe it’s more like 10 days).
I’ve been on my holidays.
If by ‘holidays’ you mean babysitting 29 childerbeast on my own time with no overtime and not seeing my own (much younger) children for a week, whilst making sure that theirs are fed, watered, not crying, not sick or injured and above all else, ensuring they had a great Residential.
“Why thankyou kind parents, so thoughtful of you to spare a heartfelt thankyou for tending to your darling for 5 days”.
Oh No. Hang on. Only 7 of those 29 parents bothered to say thankyou when we delivered them home safely on Friday. Most didn’t even look me in the face, even despite the joyful hearty welcome hugs I received from my own childerbeast as I returned to civilisation and terra firma.
Wezzies man! Ignorant!
I did have fun though and even entertained the troops this year by harnessing up and joining in:-
Climb up a telegraph pole and then jump off onto a trapeze you say? Sure. Why not!
Some fool had booked a 3 night camping trip for the day after my 5 day babysitting detail so off we set for Camp Katur the very next day for a Bank Holiday weekend of much needed booze and catch up with old friends.
Fab time had by all on the wonderful Camp Hill Estate. Will be going back again I reckon for a bit of glamping and alfresco hut-tubbing.
Intrepid times from the Bear who proved to be way more fearless then her Mother was at that age. Tis only insanity, senility, alcohol, glib promise and idiocy that make me do such things now.
Childerbeast went all Ray Mears (with a bit of help from Mum) shelter-building in the woods. Hours of fun with nothing but branches and leaves. Brilliant!
I see that in the few days I have been incommunicado, young men are being beheaded in the street, everyone has joined UKIP, babies are being flushed down the loo, there’s been an earthquake on the Welsh coast and another mahoosive asteroid is going to skim past the Earth on Friday…
If you want me I’ll be in the shelter in the woods, hiding from the madness, with my tinned peaches, bottled water and 15 boxes of wine. *
* AKA at my Mum & Dad’s wishing I could afford lovely bedding like theirs.
(Maybe I get the kids to build another shelter in their garden and I’ll just live there like a hermit – Mum can bring me some cheese and Marmite sandwiches every now and then)