“If you have almost accidentally bedded your own Father & need to talk. Please call our special incest helpline”
Hollyoaks? Dudes! What were you thinking? I almost threw up in my own mouth a little there. Just say No No No Stevo! #firstlook
Swiftly moving on. Nettle stings on back of calves finally stopped tingling after my encounter yesterday getting forced into a bush by a white van man (and not in a good way!) Fucktard local redneck yokel not considering that a woman with 2 children walking down a public country route might have right of way over you and your massive van, just barely wide enough for the damn lane. It wouldn’t have killed you to stop & back up so we could pass in safety. No! Why not just make us back up into the hedge so I could get scratched to bits and nettled beyond belief protecting my children so you didn’t run over their toes.
Bumlord wankshaft with shit for brains!
In better news. Today, I washed my barnet and left it to dry naturally and seem to be sporting some kind of Alison Goldfrap number, which in fairness, could be worse.
If only I had her voice to match. Just need the pink playsuit (with built in gastric band of course) and some canine nurses & I’ll be set: