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You probably shouldn’t spend a huge amount of money while you’re high

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I wrote all this yesterday and then the laptop ran out of battery and switched itself off before I’d saved it to a draft.


So here we go again…

While I was off with my gimpy leg (which incidentally has started to ache again this evening) Bman and I finally stopped procrastinating about it, and went to buy a new settee. 

        I found it a painful experience truth be told. 

We had finally decided against leather – too cold in winter.  Too clammy in summer. 

Do you know how awkward it is to find a sofa that both parties like, which isn’t made of denim or patchwork or dog-shit brown elephant corduroy?  We didn’t want one that revolved like a judge’s chair on The Voice.  No gigantic cup holder large enough to accommodate a 3 litre cup of fizzy lard.  No speakers next to my head.  No necessity for it to be plugged in, charged up, recline, massage or cut the fucking grass!  In short, anything that resembled Optimus Prime was a No No.

I gave up in the end and left it to Bman.  I was highly medicated on Lysine and industrial strength Ibruprofen at the time so have no recollection of what we actually chose in the end.  The online store is no help, as he chose a different colour to the one in the store and I can’t picture what it will look like.

I’ll find out on Friday when it finally arrives (6 weeks, my arse!)

Meanwhile, it’s Children in Need and I’m forced to watch the annual sitting in a bath of beans, charrideee, pseudo celebrity sobfest with the kids.

Hopefully it might serve to remind them (albeit briefly I’m sure) just how lucky they are and how grateful that they should be about that.



About TheDHW

Not loathed by totally everyone so that's good right?

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