On Friday, the savings plan I’ve been paying into for the last 15 years, finally matured. When I took the plan out, way back in the unmarried, Manchester years, I had visions of spending my eventual savings on a fabulous holiday, or a car. Or maybe rolling around in it all in my dungarees like Demi Moore in that movie, Indecent Proposal.
15 years on and most of it has been earmarked for dull things like new windows; a vacuum cleaner (that isn’t lop-sided) a fridge; a new bed etc etc. B O R I N G!
I did spend 2 hours last night looking at dresses on ebay though and have ‘treated’ myself to a dress I don’t need, for the princely sum of 28 quid. Hardly, the last of the big spenders.
I hadn’t anticipated having to use a lump of it to pay off an outstanding credit card debt either, but hey ho! Who am I to be denied the joy of spending 45 minutes of my life on Friday evening trying to sort that out? My initial elation at finally being able to pay off the card, soon turned to apoplectic rage and frustration with my bank, who refused to relinquish the money I’d been waiting for since the year 2000. Instead they stopped my account due to ‘erroneous and suspicious activity’ i.e. there was actually money in the account for a change! I wouldn’t have minded if they had just called me to question it. Instead though I had to deal with vague text messages referring to fraud, unhelpful robotic voice recordings and warning emails before eventually being pacified, FINALLY, by a softly spoken Scottish lady – of the type they keep in storage with calming voices, in order to soothe you once they have spent half an hour driving you to utter madness and on the brink of a random shooting frenzy. I am still not convince the transaction has gone through. I dearly hope it has, or all the softly spoken Scottish people in the world will not be able to calm me down.
Next stop, one of those savings plans to cover the cost of your funeral…