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Tres bon anniversaire

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I am now 45 years old. FORTY FUCKING FIVE!  How did that happen?  Surely I’m only about 28 with the mind of a 19 year old?!

Decent haul of birthday giftage yesterday, including a highly sought after gin from my sister; a card game that I can see causing much hilarity and questioning of own morals and sense of humour from my brother.  Beautiful hand-painted card from my eldest and card with lovely message within from my youngest. Bman even got me a handbag of his own choosing that wasn’t hideous. Well done Mr B.  He forgot to get me a cake but hey ho, a girl can’t have everything.

Once we’d got ready & I’d cleaned up the gift that keeps on giving, which one of the cats had left me on the rug, it was time to head off to smokey old London Town.  It seemed only fitting that after 45 years of being known for beefing on my birthday and being a miserable git, that I should have tickets to see Les Miserables with the Childerbeast.

Youngest offspring is a big fan so she was uber excited.  Eldest wasn’t so sure on the storyline but did ask the question “Is it sad?”  Clue is in the title my love.


Note the sign for Brewer Street

I might not have had a birthday cake but I had a new bag & Greggs Tuna Crunch baguette and I was out of the ghetto,on my way to our capitol city. Bring it!

We were in London shortly after 12 and after a comedy “Go Go Go!” moment with 3 of us going through the barrier on one Oyster Card we were at Leicester Square and ready to hit the M&M store.

There’s a nack to operating the lever on those tubes. Gently does it, otherwise you’ll be paying £20 for a bag of sweets you’d pay £4 for at B&Ms. Eldest got £2.50’s worth and got about 30 M&Ms.  Not sure what happened to the man who seemed to run in slo-mo across the store shouting “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” as his unattended toddler yanked the handle to one of the tubes and caused a colourful & ultimately expensive, tsunami of M&Ms. I expect he’s weeping into his empty wallet somewhere covered in M&Ms.

After a chilled out coffee & smoothie break at Patisserie Valerie we went to the theatre.  We had good seats in the stalls and a row of Made in Chelsea types behind us who had clearly never been to the theatre before. I overheard them saying how they might move closer to the front if there were any empty seats later. I’m not sure they knew how the booking system of theatre seat allocation works.


We loved the show and I resisted the urge to sing along or tear off my revolutionary red top and wave it above my head like a flag.  (The theatre usually take a dim view of that kind of behaviour unless you’re at the Rocky Horror Show).

Show over it was time to hit the underground again and head home. Had a comedy panic moment of having settled into seats on the train and then having to clamber back off again. The conductor had made an announcement about certain tickets not being valid. Namely, the type of ticket we had.  Not wanting to get stiffed for a full price fare I made a judgement call that we ought to get off.

There was another train in 20 minutes so we got on that regardless. This time, our conductor was a laid back Northerner who just said, “Welcome ont’ t’ Leeds train” & that was it.  Never even saw the guy come down the train.

Finally got home, nackered but happy at about 10:15pm There was even a cake of sorts waiting for me in the kitchen.

Happy birthday to me and thank you for the gifts, cards and love.






About TheDHW

Not loathed by totally everyone so that's good right?

One response »

  1. So it transpires that the handbag was ordered for our eldest, as a school bag. When it arrived and deemed too small for the job, it was wrapped up for me instead as an extra birthday gift. So not chosen especially for me after all.
    I did not need to know that.


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