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Tag Archives: Dirty Dancing

In the mix and trying not to barf at the bass

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So for the meal out in Manc and Little Mix gig I decided to go with, ‘I can still  just about pull this off’.

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In my head I looked a bit like one of my favourite Vargas prints only with less visible downtown lady area:-

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As you can see, it’s almost a seamless likeness.        #shouldhavegonetospecsavers

On arrival in Manc, I decided to show the childerbeast an example of not judging a book by its cover and a physics lesson on how sometimes things are bigger on the inside than they appear on the outside –  via the medium of Afflecks Palace.  Unimpressed at first view, they were soon cooing and oohing and ahhing and wanting to buy things they never knew they wanted and saying,”It’s massive?” and “Where did all this space come from?” and “Mum can I buy this fimo jewellery in the shape of a jammy dodger?”

We then checked into one of the nicest Travelodges I’ve ever been in (not saying much I know), but it was spotlessly clean and the room was huge and beds extremely comfortable.  All for the bargain price of £34, including full English!

Had a lovely early evening meal out with my sister and bro-in-law and the tinies before educating the childerbeast again about the strange race of people who only appear when a major entertainment event is occurring.  Wheeling their barrows of glittered, flashing and neon tat through the streets.  Accosting the unwary and peddling their feathery stetsons, glittery LED wands and other such bobbins to the gig-going public.  I am pretty sure this phenomenon only happens at cheese-pop and girly type shows and almost certainly doesn’t happen at rock gigs or outside the La Scala when La Boheme is on.

Childerbeast were unprepared for the scale of the Phones4U Arena – again greeted with a resounding cries of “WOAAAHH!”  I regaled them with some “there was this one time…” stories, like the time we were banned from ever using the executive Coca-Cola suite again after a Beastie Boys gig in the ’90s*, but I’m not sure they were interested.**

I was just grateful it was an all seated event.  Don’t think the childer would have appreciated any Mum-Crumping once the band came on.  After an hour of utter rubbish masquerading as support acts – one of whom was some kind of hideous hybrid of Hi-5 and Steps, who made up for what they lacked in harmonies or talent with pounding bass.  It soon transpired that my youngest has not inherited her mother’s ability to handle the bassbins.  3 times I had to take her out because she thought she was going to be sick!   This is what you get for being paper thin and having a tiny chest cavity.  Baby bird needs to beef up a bit, eat her greens and build up some bass resilience (or take ear plugs next time… whichever.)

Totally NOT addicted to bass

Totally NOT addicted to bass

As I was just about losing the will to live and considering throwing myself down the steps just to escape, the Mix finally appeared and my bassphobic child seemed to finally get into it with her little strumpet idols.  In fairness, they can sing and did put on a decent show with some semi-clad eye candy for the mums (quite obviously gay, but that doesn’t matter if you’re only looking).

So, in July, when we have tickets to see them again in Scarborough, I think it must be Bman’s turn because I have been there (twice counting last year in Liverpool) and bought the T-shirt (purchased from an unlicensed trader outside for a fiver.)  Another lesson learned by my childerbeast.  Don’t buy the overpriced low quality tat inside the venue, wait til you get outside and get cheap, low quality gear instead.

Apparently it's in his DNA

Apparently it’s in his DNA

I also learned something that night, in fact I learned two things.  (1) Yes it is possible to wrestle the cap from a bottle of Koppaberg Pear with a teaspoon and (2) before doing so, why not have a look around and you might have saved yourself the bother.

Doh!  Deffo should have gone to Specsavers

Doh! Deffo should have gone to Specsavers

Last activity of the half term tomorrow.  Dirty Dancing Campout Night at Camp Katur in Bedale. 

I will most certainly be carrying a watermelon.

🙂

The Log (as seen in the 'mangrove swamp' at The Moss)

The Log (as seen in the ‘mangrove swamp’ at The Moss)

 

*  Now THAT was a hangover (almost as good as the one after the Elliott Smith gig when we took Elliot and his roadies on a tour of Rusholme and Fallowfield.)

**  Little factoid – when I gave birth to childerbeast No. 2 I was wearing the Beastie Boys Tee that Bman bought at that same gig.

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Still here… haven’t blown away

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Realised I haven’t mentioned anything about half term and our trip to Wales and the ‘storm of the century’ and what I eventually wore at Halloween etc.

So:-  It was half term last week.  We went to Wales.  At one point it was rather windy & I feared our accommodation might blow off the hilltop and into the Tay estuary… but it didn’t, so that was good.  The whole place put me in mind of Kellerman’s Mountain Retreat from Dirty Dancing (but sadly lacking in the Johnny Castle department.)

Childerbeast pretending to look as if they were hanging onto the gate in the wind… but it went wrong & Thing 2 face-planted to the floor.

We also went to Chester for a couple of days.  A 5½ hours journey by train from Carmarthen!  Numb-bum times.  Lovely scenery though.

 

Went to Chester Zoo and almost had to have ‘the talk’.  
                   “Mum look at those animals giving each other piggy backs!”
                   ” Ha ha Hmmm,, moving on. Look there’s the gift shop!”

Laughing elephant at Chester Zoo

Laughing elephant at Chester Zoo (maybe because it was on it’s way to have a piggy back)

Back in the projects for Halloween (you know you’re back in the hood when the trick or treaters come round on mini quad bikes! )
          In the finish I utilised the sequined frock I bought for 70’s night at Magic Loungeabout the other year and  went as ‘The Death of  a Disco Dancer’ (#Smithsfans)  Not sure the native teenage populus were expecting this when they knocked on the door.  Especially when I went into teacher mode and gave them a dressing down for not dressing up or saying please and thank you as they tried to jip me of my double lollies and fizz whizz.

well it happens a lot round here

well it happens a lot round here

I think I suit the zombie look - easier to maintain than glam make up

I think I suit the zombie look – easier to maintain than glam make up

Bman didn’t bother this year.

                                                                        🙂

Such an attractive couple

Such an attractive couple

And that, as they say, was about that…

Ciao peeps Xx

“Right here is where we make you pay… in SWEAT!”

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Things you never ever thought you’d see yourself doing # 26

   Being Pudsey Bear’s seeing eye leader and helping ‘him’ down a corridor.

Things you never ever thought you’d say out loud to a crowd # 116

“You have to listen to the music. If you don’t feel the music you can’t dance to the music”

Who am I?   Louie Spence?    That teacher bird from ‘Fame’?    Johnny Castle?  FFS!

Ga Gung Ga Gung Ga Gung
 
Loving todays episode of ‘Pointless’.  How PC of the Beeb to show an Inclusion & Diversity Special.  Lloyd & Drew?  Holy Moly!  Here’s hoping that on Monday they get categories along the lines of: Folk Singers, styles of courderoy trousers or the Norwegian Leather Industry.   And as for the dude who said ‘Oliver’ was an Oscar Wilde play!   Feckin heck!

starter for 10

 

I’m back from outerspace (well…Ancoats to be precise)

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Birthday over, been & gone & I’m still here to tell the tale and thus far, dealing with my 40’s quite well cheers.

Thankyou to everyone who facebored me as my incognito alter-ego, and thanks for the text messages; even the generic ones that come already pre-programmed on your phone or left over from a previous birthday, unimaginative yet still thoughtful in their own way :-)

Had a lovely lunch in Castlefields with Bman, Childerbeast, folks & sibs and got way more than I bargained for in the way of giftage – which was nice.

Seven go mad in Manc became six, as one fell at the first hurdle :-( but it all turned out pretty well as it goes.  For the first time in many years I have to admit that I had a bloody good birthday & it’s all thanks to awesome family & some fab friends!      Suitably sozzled yet civilised I think.

The hotel was great, albeit with a touch of the backpacker about it on check-in as we jostled for space alongside about 2 dozen fresh-faced and over-eager 18 year olds, waiting for their mums to check them in and pay their deposits. (Let me know how that went down guys when she found out she wasn’t getting her £100 back after you trashed the gaff and kept everyone awake all night banging on doors and chundering in the stairwell.)

The whole of Manchester is your bitch for the night; you’re 18 years old and it’s barely 3:30am and where do you want to party? Outside my flipping room! That’s where!  Natch I can see why you would gravitate towards a room full of drunken 30somethings and a 40 year old in their PJ’s with a fridge full of wine and bottle of Grey Goose, but come on people! Get out there while you’re still able!

 

Dirty Dancing the Musical was like a mahoosive hen party.  If any men out there have got tickets for their wives for this show I strongly suggest that you offer yours to one of her mates and steer well clear, unless you’re a huge DD fan or possibly a closet homosexual. When he said the lineNobody puts baby in a corner” the entire Palace Theatre went nuts.

Time of our lives indeed…

Met my bro & bro-n law afterwards and went for drinks in Odder and I think they may have been drunker than we were. Needless to say, despite my earlier claims that I was going to look ‘hot as’ in my new frock; I pretty much just looked like me but with a smarter hair cut. That’s ok though, I’ve come to terms with myself & my averageness :-)

Good news is that when I cracked a joke to the Concierge when we checked out of the hotel, that my bag was so heavy due to it containing the dismembered body parts of the kids who’d hammered on my door at 4:30am; they offered us a full refund of our stay as a gesture of goodwill!

Bang tidy.

We’re going to bank it and go again in the new year for the Hangover Part 2 (but this time I want a smoking drug dealing monkey in a denim jacket).

Thoroughly enjoyed my shopping spree round Man with Ms Aconley too – cue much pisstaking and laughing at the dodgy knitwear in Primani and almost tempted to buy all of these cushions just because they were £3 a piece:-

Pictorial evidence of the night to follow although none too disgraceful thankfully (or perhaps disappointingly). Better luck next time eh?