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Fun after dark & that time I was saved by lesbians

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Last weekend I spent Saturday night raking about in the dark at a medical museum in Leeds that used to be a workhouse back in the mists of time.

What energies could possibly be lurking about there then?

Imagine my geeky joy when the company running this after hours event uttered the magic words;

“Feel free to go off on your own, just as long as you let us know roughly where you’re headed”

Get in!!


So, a ghost hunt, in the dark; free reign to wander with my equally geekish pal, and it was in a museum full of bizarre medical implements with a buffet laid on to boot.

What is not to like there?   Cue such phrases as; “I’m quite partial to an iron lung”,Ooooh trepanning” and “let’s pretend we’re in an Isis video”.



That time I helped Karl Pilkington amputate a leg



That time we pretended to have been captured by Isis


Good times.

  The next day I took a wander up the road to the store.  When I got there I realized I didn’t have my phone. I thought perhaps I’d left it at home.  I retraced my steps anyway but no joy.  No luck at home either.  What a pain!  Rang the mobile company to suspend the account while youngest rang the phone just in case anyone had it.

They did!

She passes the phone to me and I hear a masculine voice say “Remember them two lesbians you passed on the bridge?”  I remembered passing two girls who looked as if they were doing the Sunday morning walk of shame home.  I wondered why this dude on the phone was bringing them up??

“Well that’s us”, says the ‘dude’.

Ah. Now I see.

It seemed they had seen me motor past them in a hurry.  My phone must’ve slipped from my hoodie pocket.  They saw it on the ground and picked it up.  Shouted me (but I had headphones on, lost in the Metallica zone).  They tried running after me, but both had massive chunky platform shoes on.  They couldn’t find me at B&M or Morries (because I was in Iceland) so when they got home they put an appeal out on FB to locate the phone owner.  Of course, I sacked FB off last year (very soul cleansing – I recommend it!)

Anyhow, seems they live down the road on the council estate so I said I’d go round and pick it up.
I made youngest come with me (eldest was out) just in case I got sex-trafficked (more likely she would TBH) or if they were homicidal lesbians, who lure victims to their killing lair by taking their phone hostage.

Turns out, they were good people.  There are actually some out there.  Who knew?
I gave them each an Easter egg as a thank you (had bought them for workmates – so pardon about that!)   I also offered them a tenner reward but they wouldn’t take it.

So, no need to get a new phone.  No need to get it blocked. And I got out of the ghetto down the road without too many shouts of “Hya Miss!”  Man am I glad I don’t live down there – for more reasons than just avoiding students I teach.

A good weekend indeed.


On half term now and thank fuck for it!  I was about at the end of my last nerve.  Definitely need two weeks off for Easter. 

 This is probably the best thing that will be on TV over the Easter weekend though.  They just don’t make shows like, ‘Easter with Liberace’ anymore…probably just as well.


Pretty sure this is where they got the idea for Donnie Darko

Ciao Ciao & be kind y’all.




They’re behind you!

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Another weekend. Another night spent pratting about in the dark with my pal. 


On the way to our latest venue last night, we called for petrol and saw a colleague from work & his mate.  They were on their way to an evening of Dungeons & Dragons. Am pretty sure that this wins in a hand of Twat Top Trumps and our Garage Forecourt Geek-Off (but it’s a close call, as at least their evening was free!)



Armley Mills after dark.  It could only have been improved if there had been less people there, or even better – just Scoob and I left to our own devices.
There were 10 noobs there and 17 experienced twats idiots loons paranormal investigators of varying degrees of hopeful skepticism and belief.

During the introduction and health & safety talk in the brightly lit meeting/cafeteria area, I was tugged on the hood (not a sexual euphemism) although nobody was anywhere near me. So that was a good start.


When the over-long intro part was finally done, we all followed Pammie PamPam ‘please call me Pamela not Pam’ on a tour of the museum.  I’ve been a few times and it did feel strange to be there in civilian garb.  Usually when I’ve been, it’s for a school trip about Victorians and we’ve all been dressed up like this:-

Sepia Kit

Assume the position for your caning


Last time I was there, a couple of years ago, I was poked in the back of the leg when all my young charges were accounted for.  The time before that, my work mate thought I was stood behind her in the school room until she realized I was across the other side of the room. Again, all the children and other staff were accounted for.


First we entered the carding room area, with the huge carding machine and the old looms.  This room is alive (or should that be dead) with residual energy and is where I was prodded last time.  A very definite “They’re heeeere!” moment in this area.


I often get a whoosh of something or other next to the carding machine.  Possibly just thinking about how many severed extremities are probably still within its spikey workings.  In fact one of the other people there said his grandfather had met his end whilst cleaning such a machine at a different mill, when someone switched the machine back on and he was dragged into the mechanism!


I was keen next to go in the cinema area – not an original feature of the mill of course. It was the old Armley cinema. Fixtures and fittings moved and reassembled exactly the same.  One of my friends refuses to go in there at all on school trips. She doesn’t like the vibe at all.
I had no fear of it, although we did feel that there was a man watching us, somewhat amused. Probably thinking,
“WTF are these dumbarses doing buggering about in the dark?”  Whoever he was, the sod touched me on the shoulder. And I mean a hand on the shoulder touch, not like there was a moth on me or anything.  I felt it and I jumped.  And there was nobody else there.

Admittedly I did not jump as high as when I turned and was face to face with my pal in the dark, who I thought had walked off.  I properly babbed myself then! LOL.


Fooks Saaaake Scoob!

When on our own in the sewing machine room, someone walked between the two of us. A very definite rush of cold air, with no open windows or doors and we both felt it at the same time.

The sewing machine room

Usual meaningless bollocks on the ouija boards – I don’t trust them, or rather I don’t trust the people around the board. Fascinating though it may be from a scientific and psychological study point of view.  I  was getting distracted by some quality parabolia on this heater – a relation of Wilson the ball maybe?

I had a clamber about taking pics underneath the machinery.  I figured if I was a dead child still lingering about, I’d be hiding underneath or behind some shit, giggling and getting ready to prod the unsuspecting living for a laugh. What with lurking about for years in the nether, possibly being a bit dull.

Don’t let the brightness of these photos fool you.  The flash on my camera is super bright.  It was black as pitch in there.

Nice light anomaly on here (prob just torch flare)

Very entertaining evening. I only wish we’d had more time to explore on our own without 25 other people making a load of racket.

Next time – Nottingham Galleries of Justice in November.

Ciao for now MoFos. xX