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Tag Archives: Murder on the Orient Express

This blog is all over the place today. Much like myself.

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New job title of the week:  Bovine by-product redistribution agent


First there was this:-

Then my MiL spake (it’s a word) the prophetic words  “How long will it take before some other child decides to copycat?”

Barely a day later there was this:-

    Wales teacher death plot

and this:-

     Primary school poison plot


I won’t lie.  I’m pretty sure I’m on a list, and likely very high up, and not in the Do Not Harm column either.
Perhaps not so much this year, but to use a fave word of Gene Genie’s,
‘deffo’ the last few years.  I reckon it’d be like the final reveal in Murder on the Orient Express.  In fact I’d wager that I’m on at least 2 members of staff’s mental hit-list.  (I don’t think any of them are at that stage yet of actually having a real written list.)   However, it could happen.

Form an orderly queue people…

Worrying and shameful times indeed.


but keep your wits about you more than ever!

Meanwhile, a good SAT’s question for my lovely eldest offspring for next week’s exams, might go a little something like this:-

  If a bath is running at approximately 1000ml per 6 seconds and the plug goes in at 1830. You add a bathbomb at 1835 then disappear to listen to music on your iPad while your mother is ironing downstairs.  Who gets the blame first when your father yells upstairs that there is water dripping through the kitchen ceiling and all hell breaks loose at 1900?


No damage done really other than to pride and feelings but now it seems I will have to sit and observe the bath filling operation myself, as everybody in the house has the memory of a goldfish,  the attention span of a fruit fly & the short-temper of Gordon Ramsay.


Just for the record – if I were to organise a new system to improve communication, I’d make sure said system was well hidden.  Perhaps under a table, beneath a bunch of takeaway menus & a clothing catalogue for people who need elastic waisted jeans and kaftans.  It makes perfect sense.   Just saying.