While I was having a lazy Sunday watching ‘Beauty and the Beast’ – this is me, explaining to Bman right at the end of the movie, where all the people suddenly appeared from in the castle.
Me: They were all the staff at the castle, cursed and turned into household objects.
Me: The beast, when he was a prince wasn’t very nice to a passing witch or something and she turned him into a beast along with the staff into objects.
Him: Why? It wasn’t their fault that that he was an arse
Me: Don’t get at me about it. I didn’t write the story
Him: So who is this guy?
Me: He was the clock
Him: This fella?
Me: The candlestick
Him: Wait! Where did that little kid come from?
Me: * sigh* he was the chipped cup
We have also had conversations this week about Simon Mayo being in the ‘Fast Show’ (he meant Simon Day) and how he should be the new presenter of a revamped ‘Runaround’ for 2020, what with Mike Reid being dead now and all.
…and my particular favourite:-
Him: So the Wicker Man is on next week
Me: Which version?
Him: Well it’s not the one with Sylvester Stallone in it.
Him: Sylvester Stallone.
Me: You mean Nicholas Cage
Him: Do I? Ah yes. well not that one
Me: So the original one
Him: Aye, the one with Rustie Lee in it.
Me: (choking slightly on my drink) FFS Brew, you mean Christopher Lee.
Him: (laughs) Oh yeah.
Me: Give me strength. Rustie fucking Lee? What when she made a jambalaya for the people of Summerisle? Fooks saaake!
I forgot to mention on my last post – when I googled memes about Bradford, I found this one. Made me chuckle, And those in the know will know and they will laugh too. “erm, no I don’t think so”
Hope you have a great week next week MoFos – and to all the witches, pagans and wiccans out there, hope you’ve had a productive Mabon this weekend.
Ciao Ciao Xx