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Back in the game

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Today was the start of my phased return to work.  Just an hour a day for this week and then building up eventually to full days.

Baby steps.

Had to have a return to work risk assessment meeting today with some form-filling. Presumably to clarify that I wasn’t going to sit in the book corner wearing a tin foil hat and babbling about voices like the Son of Sam killer.


I came home and did a mammoth work out on my step and my other gizmo. Health Health Health.
    I’m not bothered so much about being slim and svelte. I’d rather be firmed up and strong.  Like Sarah Connor in Terminator 2. \

She rocks!



Always best to be prepared for the artificial intelligence uprising. (It’ll start with those Alexa, Echo gizmos, you mark my words!)  Or a zombie invasion. Whichever… Although I went to the post office this afternoon and it’s quite possible that the zombie apocalypse has already begun and we just haven’t noticed yet.  The irony of the song ‘Across 110th Street’ by Bobby Womack, on my MP3 was not lost on me as I was stood in the queue with the toothless and unkempt of the neighbourhood.  (FYI Bman, ‘Across 110th Street’ is nothing to do with, “that film about Father Christmas” – I think you’ll find that is ‘Miracle on 34th Street’ – FFS!)

Easy to be this positive on day one though.  I may go to pieces again before the week’s out.

Ciao Tutti



The end of the world starts with flesh eating rodents

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I am reliably informed that it is Throwback Thursday today, where you can just post old shit on FB or your blog or Twitter or whatever.   Interestingly it is also my youngest daughter’s birthday today.  She is 9 now and not a throwback at all – actually she is pretty damn intelligent and brilliantly bonkers. Xxx

If I had any photos or CCTV footage of mine and Bman’s comedy wheelchair chase through the corridors of Leeds General Infirmary at 3am, 9 years ago today, then I would happily share them with the Information Superhighway.  Sadly, or perhaps fortunately (it depends on your sense of humour and sensitive nature) I don’t.




In other news:-  This happened…

It hurt like a tiny machete slicing into my flesh

It hurt like a tiny machete slicing into my flesh

One of them has the taste of blood now.
I can’t find much online about zombie degus but I am pretty sure that this is how the zombie Chilean ground squirrel apocalypse will (probably) start.

The rain keeps coming, the floods haven’t abated, family pets are eating babies and there was a 4:1 quake in the SW of England today.  I am just waiting for the fire and brimstone and 4 horsemen to show up.

Let’s hope my Mum and Dad  have got some tinned peaches in for our visit this weekend.  (The closest I could find online at Forman’s Mum was this:-  I’ll pop into Aldi in Manc en-route and see what they have in the way of apocalyptic  end of days food staples eh?


Ooh, and go and see the LegoMovie.  It really is awesome.

What I was doing when I should have been asleep

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What the hell did we do with ourselves in our free time before the Internet came along? 

We can’t just have sat around watching the test card waiting for ‘Crossroads’ to start or playing clock patience in front of the electric fire.

 Last night I spent 4 hours (count them… F O U R hours) looking at utter garbage online.  [I say garbage but one woman’s garbage is another man’s treat – Define garbage! Sometimes it’s a thin line you know.]

   What I was actually doing was making a party invitation on Publisher (that’s right, Publisher, not Word) and doctoring a photo of Limahl from Kajagoogoo to make him look like a zombie (as you do) which entertained me for at least one of those hours.

"Too shy shy, oops there goes my eye?"


   I also spent a long time trying to track down a jelly mould in the shape of a brain for under £12.  £12! for a jelly mould??  You have to be kidding! 

   I found much cheaper moulds but they were in the shape of penises (penii??) and boobs and amusing as that might be, I didn’t think either appropriate for a family friendly do.







I really do need to start going to bed earlier,  but at least I wasn’t drunk and bidding for shit on ebay that I can’t afford or would fit in the house. Lest we not forget that time I almost bought Bman the actual Mr Staypuft head from the ‘Ghostbusters’ movie – where the hell I thought it was going to go I do not know!

Happy birthday Hun - here's a giant marshmallow heid for on top of the shed